Conversations with a 5 yr old... (Updated)

Him: (Referring to the blanket he named Fuzz when he was two.) Dad, how do I know this blanket is really Fuzz?

Me: (Trying to get ready to leave the house.) That's either a totally inane question, or it's so philosophically profound that I don't have time to answer it right now.

Update: Conversations with the 10 yr old go more like this:

(After a brief discussion in which I informed her that getting two out of ten questions correct on her history quiz meant that she was going to have to reread the chapter, find the correct answers to the ones she missed, and write down the page numbers where she found them...)

Her: Why are you being so horrible to me?

Me: I'm not being horrible, I'm being strict.

Her: You ARE being horrible!

Me: I'm not, I'm being strict.

Her: You ARE!

Me: Baby...

Her: Don't call me BABY!! Cause I'm NOT your BABY!!!!

Update 2: This just in... I've been handed a note explaining her position.

It's like you're feeding me sour cream cheese.* And acting like a brat.** I try to get done. I try to read the chapter, and I do the test, but am I free?

->NO!!<-

Just another day at the office...

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*Yeah, I have no clue what that's about.

**That she thought to scratch that part out shows real progress. She doesn't usually edit those thoughts.